What is De-Implementation?

A recent education movement called “de-implementation” advocates eliminating “low-value” practices in schools to save time and money and prevent teacher burnout.

It takes so long to read the Adminspeak explanation of what “de-implementation” means that the average teacher would be halfway down a bottle of Hennesey before realizing that “de-implementation” means cutting the BS.

Suggestions for cutting the BS in high schools usually include reducing unread compliance paperwork and eliminating redundant evaluations destined for the dustbin. 

In practice, de-implementation usually means a lot of very long meetings about canceling long meetings and repetitive emails about reducing email.

How To Cut The BS at PSZ

During a recent interminable Zoom meeting on de-implementation, a group of Public School Zero teachers in a private chat came up with their own lists of ways to reduce BS in high school.  

  • First period: Teenagers’ brain chemistry means they are not fully awake in the morning. What is the point of trying to teach these angry zombies when we could be sleeping in ourselves? First period, and even second and third period, are definitely “low value.”
  • Homework: There is no evidence that homework improves learning. But there is plenty of evidence that grading homework interferes with teachers’ TV time at home. Out with the homework, time for a Game Of Thrones marathon!
  • Schools: School buildings are riddled with lead paint, mold, and asbestos. Attempts to fix these unhealthy buildings usually end in boondoggle giveaways to someone’s brother-in-law. Let’s just get rid of the school buildings.  
  • Students: Teenagers learn better by doing. They are happier working and sleeping than at school. How often do students tell us they hate school? Very often. It is also really hard to control teens and they smell bad. Let’s get rid of teenage students and replace them with adults who are eager to learn.  

No, teachers are not suggesting taking all of the BS of high school online or remote. We are suggesting getting rid of high school altogether. If we replace schools with senior centers for oldsters who love public television documentaries and are happy to listen to really long podcasts about the Civil War, the whole world will be a happier place.  

Kids want to get out and do things, and oldsters want to curl up with a book. Why in the world are the kids imprisoned in high schools and the adults denied the time to think about olden times and contemplate the math on their pension funds?

With the money we could save on delaying high school and college until middle age, we could work on the problems of poverty that make it so hard for many kids to learn.  

Right-wing extremists are already intent on dismantling the public school system because they don’t want its resources to be shared with people of color and the ungodly lesbian pet therapists.  

The teachers of Public School Zero suggest that allowing schools to be dismantled in the name of ignorance is a low-value proposition. Let’s de-implement gutting universal free education and instead repurpose schools to educate the generation that is trying to destroy them. 

Perhaps if Critical Race Theory is an elective, some of the Angry Oldsters might end up taking the class just to sit next to the Hot Liberal and accidentally learn something.  

Cranky seniors might also learn from sex ed that wasn’t taught in their day. It could be they were gay themselves but just not allowed to say it. As for puppy therapy, really, what’s not to like?

Also Read: The Reason No One Wants To Work At Public School Zero

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